You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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