Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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