I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
