He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
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