Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
