Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize