nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
