We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Randomize