Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
