She is in my trunk
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
