Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
