i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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