so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
