haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
