my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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