When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize