Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
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I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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