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  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:57pm

    Good news: God is real, jackass.

  • Submitted by gregumsdagreggy on Feb 21, 10 at 4:39pm

    If there is a god, i think he has more important things to worry about.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 6:08pm

    Glad to see im not alone on my choise for lent

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:55pm

    Good news: god's not real, so you can jerk it anytime you want, without fear of an imaginery being judging you for it.

    • 73 77
      Submitted by yayforbodysuits on Feb 21, 10 at 5:18pm

      Aw here, I'm not religious what so ever, but I give up something for lent every year anyway. Not because I'm afraid of getting into heaven but because sometimes it's good to give something up. I gave up shit talking this year haa

  • Submitted by RAAAAAAAANDY on Feb 21, 10 at 3:41pm

    I gave up jerking it for lent too. I'm hoping to make it at least half way.

  • 73 45
    Submitted by beg4pie on May 18, 10 at 11:04pm

    Why would god want you to kill a puppy, and then reward you by letting you masturbate???

  • Submitted by Anonymous012 on Feb 21, 10 at 4:07pm

    yes, because god's totally gonna smite you if you jack off when you promised you wouldn't for 40 days. what kind of moron gives something like that up for lent

  • 93 97
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 6:31pm

    If god didn't want you to masturbate he would have made your arms shorter

  • 81 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:26pm

    Go ahead and Jack off. You won't make it anyway

  • 78 79
    Submitted by rachannx9 on Feb 21, 10 at 5:14pm

    dude its sunday, you get to cheat on sundays, no joke\nso dont worry about giving in to that anti religious bullshit

  • 78 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 5:59pm

    You should've given up guilt for Lent

  • 72 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 6:47pm

    Actually, you are allowed to indulge on sundays

  • 82 96
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:26pm

    Haha good thing I'm not religious.

  • 68 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 7:25pm

    In Soviet Russia, dead puppy masturbates you!

  • 74 88
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 6:27pm

    Pretty sure god (if he either existed or actually gave a shit) would prefer you just jerk off rather than kill a puppy. And you're an idiot for choosing THAT to give up.

  • 62 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 27, 10 at 5:55pm

    I tried. I made it about two weeks.

  • 68 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 10:31pm

    But just think of how good it's gonna feel when you finally can

  • 66 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:31pm

    Yeah I broke that pact 4 times already, and ALL my other resolutions. I suck at Lent.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:00pm

    I think the real jackass here is the guy who thinks a magic man in the sky really exists.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 5:57pm

    God isn't real, go masturbate

  • 61 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 10:10pm

    I just gave up candy corn for lent =)

  • 61 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 9:44pm

    I gave up porn, I agree if god didn't want you to masturbate he wouldve given us t-Rex arms,

  • 54 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 12:04am

    Gave up masturbation too , i feel the same way . I dont think ill be able to do it though .... Im a girl btw ....

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:21pm

    4:00 is so right! More lives have been lost in the name of religion..... Bull SHIT book

  • 59 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 8:54pm

    I gave up sexting.... Jk I didn't give up shit : )

  • 56 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:25pm

    Haha, holy crap!

  • 55 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 12:51am

    I gave up pooping:(

  • 60 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 10:15pm

    u need to get laid

  • 62 85
    Submitted by Anonymousssss on Feb 21, 10 at 5:34pm

    3 days isn't long at all

  • 48 58
    Submitted by hentailover on Apr 10, 10 at 12:17am

    Why give up spanking the munky?

  • 50 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 10:06pm

    Lasted twice as long as i could!

  • 61 86
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 5:22pm

    I wish the bible came with the waring label oslf spoiler alert jesus dies!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:12pm

    Haha too bad religion is bs an there is no such thing as a god... Lent is stupid anyway. Do what you want, seriously.

  • 48 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 23, 10 at 2:46am

    Why would you give up masturbation? That would be so hard for 40 days (no pun intended)

  • 53 75
    Submitted by ShortGiraffe23 on Feb 22, 10 at 6:04am

    Next time, give up lent for lent.

  • 52 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 1:29am

    I have up sex! It's all bad.

  • 61 91
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 10:40pm

    I just gave up Catholicism.

  • 52 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:02pm

    Lmao agreed 4:00

  • 62 94
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 8:38pm

    In Soviet Russia babies kill you if you don't masturbate!

  • 53 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:59pm

    Oh, yeah? Prove it.

  • 63 96
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:23pm

    Fiiirst

  • 53 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 6:42pm

    I feel you, I gave that up as well, but a loophole is is get a chick to suck your dick, and yes that dis rhyme

  • 53 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 11:01pm

    Ah you should be me 617 I gave up drinking for lent. I feel like a damn alcholic everytime I open the fridge and gaze longingly at the beer.

  • 46 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 2:24am

    You should of gave up not masturbating aha

  • 46 69
    Submitted by kL0v1n on Feb 22, 10 at 1:41pm

    Why not just masturbate if god gives you permission to masturbate. No need to sacrifice a fuckin puppy, you jerk.

  • 43 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 10:55pm

    Dude I gave up the same thing for lent! Sucks doesn't it?

  • 44 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 11:59pm

    That's fucked 1128....... But yeah I agree lolzz

  • 40 65
    Submitted by Chalmers15 on Apr 18, 10 at 1:16am

    Atheists should give up living. There's no point to your existence anyways.

  • 45 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 11:15pm

    who gives a fuck? atheists live so much better.

  • 55 96
    Submitted by Bschoepp on Feb 21, 10 at 9:50pm

    i gave up that and cussing! not masturbating makes me mad and that makes me want to cuss even more! bad combo

  • 45 86
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 11:39pm

    11:15 but when they die it's so much worse

  • 41 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 22, 10 at 9:03am

    Gotta love angry anonomous Internet athiests! But I could pick on the catholics and their non bible based hollidays as well. It's all relative I suppose.

  • 41 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 6:53pm

    Hahahahah 631

  • 45 92
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 4:35pm

    HAHAHHA so true 4:00. I love you

  • 48 98
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:53pm

    Yttrrewwq

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 21, 10 at 3:30pm

    Good thing I didn't give that up I would die if I couldn't masturbate. I'm up to 13 times a day. Woohoo

    • 49 64
      Submitted by I_Win on Feb 21, 10 at 11:28pm

      Two questions, guy or girl? If this is a guy, wtf.. Do you have like a gallon bottle of lotion.. What do you use? LOL (If it's a girl, congratz)

    • 63 67
      Submitted by Megrathea42 on Feb 22, 10 at 6:41am

      13 times? How are you not bleeding?