we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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