My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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