puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
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Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
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Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
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