He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
