I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
