You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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