yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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