Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
