he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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