Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Randomize
