she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
