I'm really into asian looking animals
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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