I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize