i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
it hurts more in the daytime
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
