He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Can I color on your dick again?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
my nose is crying tears of wow.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
