clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Green mimosas i think yes
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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