Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize