i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
