Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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