Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
