Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
