So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Randomize
