Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
