so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize