maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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