Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
