I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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