Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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