i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
