Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I just want nice things and good sex
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
