Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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