Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
