i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
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